The Austin Dating Chronicles

You know the age old saying, “never mix business with pleasure” well as far as black out drunk me goes, that rule does not exist, nor has it ever existed in the space time continuum. The barely alive, last two functioning brain cells dancing around in my head thought that it would be a grand idea to walk up to Mr. Not-Available and tell him right then and there: “Hey I have to tell you something.”

No of course it wasn’t logical, no of course it wasn’t smooth. I was completely shitfaced and what I had to say was absolutely ridiculous. Over the loud music, I lean up to him, look him dead in the eyes, and with the most straight face ever say: “I KNOW you think I’m cute.” No, no that was not a typo. I know what you’re thinking okay. Where does this drunk bitch even find the audacity? And to that my friend, my answer is: I have no clue.

But it doesn’t end there.

I then proceed to hand him my phone and make him put his number in it. I tell him that he needs to buy me a drink and that he owes me matcha the next morning. For someone who doesn’t want to be embarrassed or be outed for dating someone at work I did a KILLER job at trying to be discrete because I decided it would be a fun idea to do all this in front of my COWORKERS who I was out drinking with. Did I mention I was with sales people? The biggest gossips in the entire universe? Love that for me 🥲

Luckily I puked in my Uber on the way home and decided to make that my embarrassing take away for the evening. Messaging one too many trusted colleagues that I threw up in my Uber. By the time my hungover ass got to my work’s Field Day, everyone knew. Which I guess I would rather be known as the-girl-who-puked-in-her-uber instead of the-girl-who-is-finessing her colleagues and turning public work outings into her personal dating scene.

To my surprise, Mr. Not-Available wanted to still take me to get matcha. We ended up going to this cute coffee shop in South Austin. We talked for three hours, made some pretty intense eye contact, and compared our astrology birth charts because he is really into astrology. I also had the audacity to tell him that I had a blog 🙃

All in all, the date went really well and as far as I am concerned Mr.Not-Available is EXTREMELY available. He repeatedly told me that I was cute. He asked me multiple times, “So what’s next?” I loved his gentleness and how intentional he was. So of course fully sober me looked him dead in the eye AGAIN and asked him if he was going to kiss me or not.

So he did.

And we kissed.

It was nice.

So then why is it that I am so bothered and concerned? Why is it that I still feel like something is not right? I love my job. I am passionate about my career. I would hate for a man to ruin that for me, but in the same breath, I love being loved. I love attention, I love someone wanting to spend time with me, and wanting to call me. I like this guy, but it seems that I am worried about what will happen if we continue to move forward.

I wish there was another way to work around it. I wish the lines were not so definite between business and pleasure 😐

So my dear readers, I must ask, what would you do?